Tomatoes and Children

Photo by CJW

by Kelly Knowlden

Tomatoes grow best in 75-85 degree temperatures. The soil should be kept evenly moist and prepared with a good fertilizer.

It should be no surprise that children also grow best in certain conditions. Let me consider just one of those. But let me first tell you a story to illustrate the point that I want to make.

When our oldest son was in first grade, I was the teacher. I had a good relationship with him and things went along fine. However, school is a bit different from home and he would do these things that all kids do - but he was my son and I didn’t want him to do them... For example, rolling his pencil down the desk for the purpose of hearing the sound it makes. I would look at him with a stern look and shake my head. I would use my eyebrows to express “STOP already!” I would use other facial methods for conveying my disapproval. After several weeks of this, I began to realize that my relationship with him was different. Then I heard our pastor speak about Proverbs 3:12 ...because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in. It was the last part of the verse that hit me like a ton of bricks. If someone asked my son if Daddy loved him he would have answered “yes...” because he knew it was the right answer. If the question was, “Does it feel like Daddy loves him,” I think the answer would have been quite different. I had inadvertently put him in the “doghouse” daily by my looks and attitudes.

Growing children who do not look elsewhere for their acceptance is dependent upon parents being able to create an atmosphere where the child FEELS loved. We do that by our acceptance of them in spite of all their foibles and misbehavior. (That does not mean that we accept that behavior; that topic will be next week...) Rather it resembles the love that we receive from the Lord of glory.
How are you conveying that everyday?