by Kelly Knowlden
We often make the mistake of thinking that the “big” people and institutions in life are what change culture. While it is true that they shape culture, it is really the “little” people like you and me that change a culture. It is not government, or businesses or presidents or judges that really change culture.
It is those who will stand up for what is right, who are willing to fight for moral reasons - passing laws on the basis of moral reasons, not votes or convenience. It is those who are willing to care about our neighbors, who are willing to live outside of self, who do not live by how they feel. It is done by those who will speak in private as though they were on the podium, remembering that God in heaven knows all and will bring into account all actions done, all words said. It is by those who raise children who work hard and know what it is to live under submission to authority - not because the authority is always right, but because it is always right to respect those who have that God-ordained calling. It is those same parents who are not content when the greatest delight in life is to sit in front of a screen and wipe out virtual men. They will want their children to be exposed to the greatest thinkers of all time and will seek to understand them and their legacy. They are going to hold them to the highest standard and not allow them to complain because it is too hard. And then they are also going to teach their children how to respond when they are sinned against... not by complaining about all the other teachers and children in the world, but by showing them who Jesus is and why He came. They are not going to allow their children to excuse their behavior with “reasons.” They are not going to point fingers elsewhere when things don’t go their way. They are going to remind them that when there are interpersonal problems the solution always lies within themselves - not in changing the other guy. They are going to be those who do not look at the color of skin nor their nationality, but rather measure a man by his character, his integrity. These will be those who change culture.
Ultimately it lies in those who have had their heart’s culture changed...who see their need of a resurrected Lord to overcome their natural tendency toward the self-orientation of life. As we reflect about the resurrection of Jesus Christ, let us pray that He would change the culture of our hearts.
Monday, March 25, 2013
Monday, March 18, 2013
Lessons from the Juvenile Court
by Kelly Knowlden
The recently published Steubenville, Ohio rape case involving two high school football players will end up in front of a grand jury in mid-April because the Attorney General said that this incident must be investigated fully. Allegations of a possible cover-up will mean that charges could be brought against any who failed to speak up after the attack last summer including other teens, parents, coaches and school officials. Students who stood by recorded the attack and gossiped about it online. Hundreds of thousands of text messages, social media posts and online photos indicated that there were those present who saw nothing worth stopping.
Here is the interesting part: The judge urged parents and others “to have discussions about how you talk to your friends, how you record things on the social media, and how you conduct yourself when drinking is put upon you by your friends.”
In our society, who is responsible? We will probably see a case that will try to make the boys and all those who texted, videoed, or uploaded photos as being exempt from guilt. The coaches will not be blamed for having the best interests of their state championship team at heart. It was the fault of the people who hosted the party. It was because there was a testosterone imbalance. It was because it was due to lack of parental oversight. Interestingly, who is allowed to speak about moral issues with students?
For those parents who speak to children out of the eternal truth of God’s Word, who take their children regularly to church, who are helping children understand what it is like to live in a fallen world and how they must learn to respond to it, you have a helper in the process. It is Immanuel Christian School. We are challenging children and young people with their responsibility to work hard and honor God with their talents and abilities. They are also responsible for their actions, whether they be wrong or right. And in our interactions with those who transgress the law, we point them to a sufficient Savior who has worked into the world the consequences of ‘reaping what is sown’ and yet is willing to forgive.
The recently published Steubenville, Ohio rape case involving two high school football players will end up in front of a grand jury in mid-April because the Attorney General said that this incident must be investigated fully. Allegations of a possible cover-up will mean that charges could be brought against any who failed to speak up after the attack last summer including other teens, parents, coaches and school officials. Students who stood by recorded the attack and gossiped about it online. Hundreds of thousands of text messages, social media posts and online photos indicated that there were those present who saw nothing worth stopping.
Here is the interesting part: The judge urged parents and others “to have discussions about how you talk to your friends, how you record things on the social media, and how you conduct yourself when drinking is put upon you by your friends.”
In our society, who is responsible? We will probably see a case that will try to make the boys and all those who texted, videoed, or uploaded photos as being exempt from guilt. The coaches will not be blamed for having the best interests of their state championship team at heart. It was the fault of the people who hosted the party. It was because there was a testosterone imbalance. It was because it was due to lack of parental oversight. Interestingly, who is allowed to speak about moral issues with students?
For those parents who speak to children out of the eternal truth of God’s Word, who take their children regularly to church, who are helping children understand what it is like to live in a fallen world and how they must learn to respond to it, you have a helper in the process. It is Immanuel Christian School. We are challenging children and young people with their responsibility to work hard and honor God with their talents and abilities. They are also responsible for their actions, whether they be wrong or right. And in our interactions with those who transgress the law, we point them to a sufficient Savior who has worked into the world the consequences of ‘reaping what is sown’ and yet is willing to forgive.
Monday, March 11, 2013
Conversations
by Kelly Knowlden
Conversation, generally defined, means to talk.
However, there is a lot of talking which would never fall into the category of an “interchange of thought” (Prov. 10:19). What often happens in group settings where talking is taking place, is one person speaks about a topic and all others stand around waiting to lunge in with their piece and so on.
Now here is where the Christian mind must do its work. For the mouth speaks out of the overflow of the heart (Luke 6:45). Self-centeredness of living will never see conversation as an opportunity to find out what is going on in the heart/mind of someone else. Rather we will “air our own opinions” (Prov. 18:2).
In talking to our children, we often end up telling them how we would deal with the problems they face (or how we did “when I was a boy...”) or we tell them what we think they need to hear. Very little time is spent in finding out what they are thinking and feeling. And so we reproduce by modeling people who mostly fill the air with self-talk.
Conversations with our children ought to be a combination of instruction in truth coupled with finding out what they are thinking. Prov. 20:5 says, “The purposes of a man’s heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out.” Learning how to ask effective questions that get “under the skin” will help them understand themselves. Then we will have the opportunity to posit objective reality into their lives that gets them past “this is how I feel.” We certainly do not want to so identify with their hurts and immature perspectives that we get drawn into their thinking, but rather we will want to ask them questions that help them hear truth that is real outside of how they feel. Those questions will sound like, “Could it be that she did not mean to snub you?” or “Is it possible that you did not hear the teacher accurately?” This will take time, effort and repentance from our own self-centered conversations but the results will be children who feel heard and engaged in the lively discourse of truth!
Conversation, generally defined, means to talk.
However, there is a lot of talking which would never fall into the category of an “interchange of thought” (Prov. 10:19). What often happens in group settings where talking is taking place, is one person speaks about a topic and all others stand around waiting to lunge in with their piece and so on.
Now here is where the Christian mind must do its work. For the mouth speaks out of the overflow of the heart (Luke 6:45). Self-centeredness of living will never see conversation as an opportunity to find out what is going on in the heart/mind of someone else. Rather we will “air our own opinions” (Prov. 18:2).
In talking to our children, we often end up telling them how we would deal with the problems they face (or how we did “when I was a boy...”) or we tell them what we think they need to hear. Very little time is spent in finding out what they are thinking and feeling. And so we reproduce by modeling people who mostly fill the air with self-talk.
Conversations with our children ought to be a combination of instruction in truth coupled with finding out what they are thinking. Prov. 20:5 says, “The purposes of a man’s heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out.” Learning how to ask effective questions that get “under the skin” will help them understand themselves. Then we will have the opportunity to posit objective reality into their lives that gets them past “this is how I feel.” We certainly do not want to so identify with their hurts and immature perspectives that we get drawn into their thinking, but rather we will want to ask them questions that help them hear truth that is real outside of how they feel. Those questions will sound like, “Could it be that she did not mean to snub you?” or “Is it possible that you did not hear the teacher accurately?” This will take time, effort and repentance from our own self-centered conversations but the results will be children who feel heard and engaged in the lively discourse of truth!
Monday, March 4, 2013
Long Term Thinking (Hope)
by Kelly Knowlden
For most of us, we end up getting mired in the here and now, because it is “in-your-face.” So we get stuck on the moments of kids who don’t obey, teens who won’t work, workmates who are incorrigible, bosses who are not compassionate, friends who fail us, front page news that is ever-alarming, etc. What should we do with all that? Let me suggest two things:
First, get something else “in-your-face.” Remember what Hebrews 12:1-3 says: “let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus.....Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” We need the daily reminders to ourselves that what we see and feel is not all that is. We need to remember that Jesus Christ came as the Son of God to experience life in a broken world to identify with us and now pleads for us. We need to remind ourselves that while I live with the brokenness of sin in me and all around me, I do not need to despair for Jesus has overcome the world and has promised something greater is coming. That leads us to the second thing.
Second, we need to remember that today is only a “slice of life” that has a before-this-day and an after-this-day to it. Today is not all there is. We often respond to circumstances as though there is no history to the problem or as though there will be no tomorrow. We want answers and solutions immediately. Often that is not how God works in the world. In Psalm 90, God reminds us that He is “our dwelling place throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or You brought forth the whole world, from everlasting to everlasting You are God.” The psalmist goes on to say that our days are like a blip on a screen and ends with asking God to “Teach us to count our days.” A songwriter added, “Make our days count.” We need to be people of long-term vision.
Children and young people are caught in the immediate gratification syndrome that is prevalent in all ages but is rampant in our day. Communication is instantaneous, connections to the web are becoming faster than light, fast food is available, credit allows us to get what we want when we want it, relationships that don’t work are dissolved, and what seems expedient at this moment is the answer that is given.
We need to build in a long term view that puts Jesus in the central place so that we do not grow weary and lose heart.
For most of us, we end up getting mired in the here and now, because it is “in-your-face.” So we get stuck on the moments of kids who don’t obey, teens who won’t work, workmates who are incorrigible, bosses who are not compassionate, friends who fail us, front page news that is ever-alarming, etc. What should we do with all that? Let me suggest two things:
First, get something else “in-your-face.” Remember what Hebrews 12:1-3 says: “let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus.....Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” We need the daily reminders to ourselves that what we see and feel is not all that is. We need to remember that Jesus Christ came as the Son of God to experience life in a broken world to identify with us and now pleads for us. We need to remind ourselves that while I live with the brokenness of sin in me and all around me, I do not need to despair for Jesus has overcome the world and has promised something greater is coming. That leads us to the second thing.
Second, we need to remember that today is only a “slice of life” that has a before-this-day and an after-this-day to it. Today is not all there is. We often respond to circumstances as though there is no history to the problem or as though there will be no tomorrow. We want answers and solutions immediately. Often that is not how God works in the world. In Psalm 90, God reminds us that He is “our dwelling place throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or You brought forth the whole world, from everlasting to everlasting You are God.” The psalmist goes on to say that our days are like a blip on a screen and ends with asking God to “Teach us to count our days.” A songwriter added, “Make our days count.” We need to be people of long-term vision.
Children and young people are caught in the immediate gratification syndrome that is prevalent in all ages but is rampant in our day. Communication is instantaneous, connections to the web are becoming faster than light, fast food is available, credit allows us to get what we want when we want it, relationships that don’t work are dissolved, and what seems expedient at this moment is the answer that is given.
We need to build in a long term view that puts Jesus in the central place so that we do not grow weary and lose heart.
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